[VIDEO] APERTURE LABORATORIES – ROMANCE SAFETY COMPLIANCE GUIDE

54 Comments

1. Caelun_Niveus on February 14th, 2011 8:32 am
   

   The Aperture Science Enrichment Center would like to remind you that, while emotional contact with the female of the human species can be emotionally and physically rewarding, it is also very likely to be financially a black hole.

   We encourage affection to the Weighted Companion Cube over the Human Female as it offers the same level of emotional gratification, but will never ask for your wallet in return.
2. Angemon300 on February 14th, 2011 8:34 am
   

   I lost my girlfriend to Diamonds. I only give video games as gifts now.
3. Vastryn on February 14th, 2011 8:43 am
   

   I'm pretty sure I'd still be in love if she let me co-operatively test her portal once in a while.
4. Rain on February 14th, 2011 8:44 am
   

   Now you're gifting with portals
5. Strike_low on February 14th, 2011 8:58 am
   

   The video is now diamonds!
6. Shatman on February 14th, 2011 9:05 am
   

   One portal is orange.
   The other is blue.
   There are turrets nearby,
   And they can see you.
7. Vlauer on February 14th, 2011 9:38 am
   

   Totally unrelated, -1 me, If you like, but I think Valentines Day is just pure bullshit. If you're in a happy relationship, every day is like a festival, am I right?

   (For the related part, I still think, that Companion Cube would make for an even better gift)
8. madhatter0082 on February 14th, 2011 9:40 am
   

   "54% of women are allergic to chocolate"

   Which is why men should be able to eat it all… for.. um.. the greater good of all humanity?
9. Jan on February 14th, 2011 9:58 am
   

   Poor stick woman was stuck in a dilemma – smashed by a diamond she could have needed to craft her own ALOHA* to protect her from falling diamonds.

   *) Aperture Laboratories Office Hazard Armor
10. WeegeeDoll on February 14th, 2011 10:13 am
    

    This video is HIGHLY inaccurate.

    Everyone knows that once she finally got that diamond, a Creeper should've popped out of nowhere and exploded, causing her to drop all her precious diamond into lava!
11. Leo E. on February 14th, 2011 10:15 am
    

    *wondering if Shawn ever got that Valentine's day submission he told me to make 5+ months ago*
12. RemielChibus on February 14th, 2011 10:41 am
    

    In the event of an anomalous response, the Weighted Companion Cube will be made available as treatment for your emotional fragility. Aperture Science would like to remind you that the Thermal Discouragement Beam is not a suggested response gift to rejection, but would enjoy recording the result if chosen as a course of action. For science.
13. Mentlegen on February 14th, 2011 11:02 am
    

    The Enrichment Center is required to remind you that if you vote this less than 5 you will be baked, and then there will be cake.

    You monster.
14. MorningMoon on February 14th, 2011 11:22 am
    

    So, basically:
    Portal 2 = Love
    <3
15. _Nate_ on February 14th, 2011 11:24 am
    

    Portal 2 is now available for preorder?!
    *Goes to steam page to preorder*
    *Realizes it still isn't able to be purchased*

    I'm not even angry.
    I'm being so sincere right now.
16. GameboyPATH on February 14th, 2011 11:36 am
    

    Since she checks Halolz every now and then, I'll use my comment to tell my special one this:

    I love you, weighted companion cube. <3
17. Daifuku on February 14th, 2011 11:56 am
    

    The Enrichment Center would like to remind you that "Bring Your Significant Other To Work Day" also coincides with Valentines Day and is an excellent time to have them apply for a position in our Testing Department!
18. BoxeyBrown on February 14th, 2011 12:20 pm
    

    Can't argue with those facts…
19. Alpar on February 14th, 2011 3:12 pm
    

    Ooh, oh, wait! Wait! I bet I can imitate the face of at least 90% of people here right now!

    Ready?

    <img src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_VSrnkiWaqSQ/TMdBQsCZScI/AAAAAAAAAZI/r7M0LAXkxW0/s1600/forever+alone+face.png"&gt;

    ….Yeah we all kinda suck at this, don't we…
20. Red on February 14th, 2011 4:14 pm
    

    Well, for all the severely desperate people on Valentines Day, the portal gun does allow for some… unorthodox applications of your time… and body…
21. greenxboy on February 14th, 2011 4:16 pm
    

    but their no point crying over every delay
    you just keep on waiting utill you ran out of cake
22. Sir_Nox on February 14th, 2011 5:33 pm
    

    Aperture Science…We do what we must because-WE'VE BEEN FANTISIZING ABOUT YOU AT NIGHT!
23. Dr. Furry on February 15th, 2011 8:34 am
    

    oh man, preorders are up? gonna get 2 copies off of steam for me and the nurse

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