Those stupid vending machines are so picky!
By Sliferjam
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Posted by Shawn Handyside on September 27, 2012 · 1:48 AM
  (115 votes, average: 3.99 out of 5) Loading ... |
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Categories: 2K Games, Borderlands, Gearbox, Secret Items, Sequential Art, Serious Business, Stinky · Leave a comment (71 Comments) |
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Did you know the site has over 4,000 video game themed lolz? 
(4.91 out of 5)
Just shoot him in the face!
He'll get better! I swear!
Why are you looking at me like that?
So that's why you needed $9,999,999+ at the end of 1. You have to find the ones that are good. Dear god the uncrumpling tango that will ensue.
I'm fairly certain Salvador's shorter than that.
Think about what it's like to try and use a vending machine using a note. You try and get it flat, get rid of the creases, try and put it in carefully, but it spits it out and then you try again, flattening it more, maybe trying a different note in your wallet. It takes you a while but eventually you get your coke/parking ticket/chocolate bar.
Now think about using a vending machine for a purchase of $200,000. You would shoot everything too.
<img src="http://rule34-data-002.paheal.net/_images/9a6c902224b5eb3d80bf0df9ac3377fa/927387%20-%20Borderlands%20Borderlands_2%20Deathtrap%20Gaige%20Hombre-Blanco%20Mechromancer.jpg">
<img src="http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/23881703.jpg" />
Phasecock
Insert Peg B into Slot A
E-peen
Dare I go on? It's hard enough to avoid equine rumps coming up with this.
<img src="http://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/c0.0.403.403/p403x403/400820_10151067875786344_198212553_n.jpg" width="100%" height="100%">
no wonder they don't work, they don't want you to buy that one of a kind gun
<img src="http://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/c0.0.403.403/p403x403/400820_10151067875786344_198212553_n.jpg" width="100%" height="100%">
no wonder they don't work, they don't want you to buy that one of a kind gun
Don't worry, Mr. Vault Hunter! There's ALWAYS money available for you at the First National Bank of Pandora.
+We're always available for quick and easy withdrawals! Just look for any of our 20,000 green-lit withdrawal boxes, in the form of chests, safes, toilets, mailboxes, and garbage dumpsters! Our safe and secure system is safe from any and all NPCs who would've never thought to open unlocked safes.
+Have friends or mutual enemies? No problem! Our patented instant transfer system benefits all party members! Even lazy and incompetent teammates are rewarded for their idleness!
+Fast, easy way to gain money! (and lose that gain immediately when you die!)
+Economy shnonomy! Just leave an area and come back, and more piles of unmarked bills will be waiting for you. It's just like having infinite money! Only without the inflation! Hooray for consequence-free capitalism!
I was looking for a response image… but found this…
Close enough?
<img src="http://i.imgur.com/IMhjn.png">
I thought this picture was perfectly clean.
Then I noticed later, oh a scroll bar.
*scrolls left*
<img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ao7CU8AXhTc/TmKXwA5yI2I/AAAAAAAAAp4/yN5W7hQ7cMM/s320/hankmccoy0317.jpg">
No wonder it won't work! That money hasn't taken enough damage! As far as that vending machine is concerned, those dollar bills are pretty damned clean!
Maybe try creasing the corners a bit…
*scrolls image*
…
*sees who posted it*
<img src="http://remyvanruiten.files.wordpress.com/2012/01/tf2_spy.jpg" width="200" length="200/">
But(t) of course.
Welcome to Markus munitions, if you don't clean that fucking money off before you try to use it, I'm going to find you and shoot you in the fucking face until you get the goddamned point!
nope, nope, nope, NOPE, nopidity, nope nope, NAHP, nopes, nopidio, norp, NROP, nopes, neeps, nahps, nipidity nopiditys, and JUST PLAIN NOOOOOOOOOPE.
This is why paper money won't work in high stress combat situations. You need to go with a currency that will never get damaged from battle. Go with rupees.
<img src="http://download.gamezone.com/uploads/image/data/872903/linkholidays-4b.jpg" alt="Rupees" height="240" width="400">
That machine says "Dr. Ned." Don't tell me Claptrap rebuilt him AGAIN…
GIVE ME THAT COMPUTER, YOU'RE DONE.
<img src=http://i1220.photobucket.com/albums/dd460/TomQuoVadis/NeverSayNoToPanda.gif>
GIVE ME THAT COMPUTER, YOU'RE DONE.
<img src=http://i1220.photobucket.com/albums/dd460/TomQuoVadis/NeverSayNoToPanda.gif>
Zoe there is one thing that this picture is missing! How the heck am I supposed to know that this was approved by a company? Preferably with a seal of sorts.
Oh just take to Coal Town, the vendor there really doesn't give a crap what state your DOSH is in, might be to do with all that vodka the Heavy keeps "sending" him….
BUTWHATDOIKNOWHUH?!
IS NOTHING SACRED TO YOU?!?
This is silly. Salvador IS his own health pack. Just Gunzerk and you're good to go.
*Sees a Zoe post*
Heh, that's Zoe alright…
*Sees scroll bar*
Oh there's more? Let's se-
[youtube CXpuRIZzJog rel="nofollow"> youtube]
Problems with that dollar bill not going into the vending machine? Pro tip: Fold the bill "hot dog style" a few times and then try it. Works every time.
Problems with that dollar bill not going into the vending machine? Pro tip: Fold the bill "hot dog style" a few times and then try it. Works every time.
If that really doesn't work, go buy yourself a hot dog.
Why do you do this to us?
*runs away sobbing*
I can't stop thinking those drawings look like they were taken out of Aqua Teen Hunger Force.
Mann vs. Machine for some odd reason never has this problem.
Maybe in the end hats are their only worthy currency.
Meh.
About time someone cashed in on this joke. Although I have to admit if it was like that IRL that would be right on the money. Comic's like these really fit the bill sometimes. Makes cents why the machine wont take it though.
My first comment and I make puns… I'm going to hell for this aren't I?