The only part of Counter-Strike that legitimately put fear in me.
Via Wil Wheaton
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Posted by Shawn Handyside on March 2, 2012 · 9:17 PM
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Categories: Advice Meme, Counter Strike, Paranoia, PC, Valve Software · Leave a comment (109 Comments) |
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STAND STILL
PRETEND YOU'RE AFK
Entire team is dead! Not big surprise!
Get blamed for defeat by entire team.
Even though you survived twice as long as the rest of them.
"No. I didn't die because I suck, I died because I wanted to see how bad you are!"
me too shawn.
thats why i toss my nade in a window and run directly in the cross fire.
that or just hide at the spawnpoint.
Rest of team is dead.
Other team is all little Korean Girls.
Rest of Team is Dead
Listen to Team Speak for eloquently defined
reasons for why you are still clearly the worst player.
Same thing in TF2 Sudden Death, except it's cooler because nobody rages on Gentleman Heavy's.
Also Wil Wheaton plays Counter Strike? Swag.
Entire team is dead. Realize your team was all bots.
My experience playing every multiplayer game ever and some singleplayer ones too.
Hah, this'd NEVER happen to me!
I ALWAYS die before my teammates!
Oh god, that happened to me last night on ME3.
I was a vanguard and there were several normal guys, couple of engineers (no biggie) and a fucking phantom (for those who don't play, basically chicks with too much health that can kill you in a second with their sword) I could feel everyone yelling at me because my tactic was "try to shoot something. See phantom. Go invisible and run like a little girl."
I did eventually win the round. And cried like a littler girl.
God I hate when that happens.
And yet…. I kill the rest of the enemy team.
This, but it's on TF2's Saxton Hale mod. And much more vocal.
>5000HP and it's "Give up!" "Stupid scouts!" "Spy can't backstab"
2500-5000HP and it's "He might do it!" "No he won't!" "GOD DAMN IT SCOUT STOP RUNNING AND START SHOOTING"
<2500HP and it's "COME ON SPY SHOOT HIM!" "USE YOUR CROCKETS!" "SLAP 'IM ONE!"
God save you if you die and Hale has 125HP left.
I would make a "FORUMS ARE DEAD" version, but I'm pretty sure Shawn doesn't mind being judged about that…
Never play Counter-Strike
Not know this feel.
Feel left out.
"Your team is dead. Good Luck." -- TF2 Announcer
This applies to TF2 Arena mode.
I played this for the first time recently.
Search and Destroy.
Search and Destroy everywhere.
Rest of Team is Dead?
JAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOO!
Other team is dead too.
Feel them judge your every move? Pah!
Hwil Hweaton?
Its gets worse once the server has all-talk on, oh wait, IT ALWAYS IS.
HE'S BEHIND YOU HE'S BEHIND YOU WTF ARE YOU DOING OMG YOU ARE SO BAD I SAID HE WAS BEHI oh my mic was muted…
It's a monument to how universal this feel is that I've only played around 20 or so CS games in my life and this still got to me.
*Ghostly figure appears*
"Be warned! You will see my spirit at de_dust!"
The extent of angry Counter Strike teammate dialogue:
"Don't pick up that weapon, don't pick that up, don't pick that u-AHHHHHHHHHHHKSDAJVNJANFCIUANVSDVINVAYUSDBNKJAN"
"Reload-Reload-Reload-RELOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"
"SHOOTHIMSHOOTHIMSHOOTHIMSHOOTHIMSHOOTHIMSHOOTHIMSHOOTHIM"
*Get picked off by really good enemy sniper*
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
YOU FUCKIN' N00B"
Yes, now they only mock your cap.
Rest of team is dead.
Hide in corner
Rest of team is dead.
Spycrab.
Play as Saxton Hale
Feel them fear your every move
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Rest of your team is dead
This plays
Out numbered by the enemy force and I'm the sole survivor?
*pulls out pistol*
<img src='http://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii53/pregoisforchumps/Personaeyes.png'>
PERSONA
*gunshot*
-Mindlessinvalid has committed suicide-
Fuck… wrong game again.
Rest of Team is dead.
Realize nobody is taller than the last man standing.
Leave no survivors.
This is why I go on foreign language servers. They generally aren't as rude and even if they start yelling, it won't matter because you can't understand them.
In the middle of a bloody war and your platoon is gone, sometimes you hear your team calling out to you from beyond the grave.
"STOP HIDING AND SHOOT THEM YOU FUCKIN' NOOB!!!11!!"
…And you wish they would just shut up.
I can't believe no-one made the obligatory Wesley Crusher reference yet, given that Wil Wheaton WAS Wesley crusher (and apparently hated it).
I WAS going to be nice and let someone else have it… but…
"Dammit Wesley! Don't grab that one, grab the other one! He's shooting at you Wesley, return fire. Don't tell me you know, stop being such a know-it-all Wesley. That other kid is dead because of you, Wesley, don't try to play it off as lag."
-Admin has banned player "Crushinater", Reason: Team Killing.-
<img src="http://i.qkme.me/3590u7.jpg" width="444">
It's not just Counter-Strike now. NO GAME IS SAFE NOW.
It doesn't matter what game you play, be it Halo or Gears of War.
THEY'RE ALWAYS WATCHING, WITH THEIR JUDGMENTAL STARE, AND THEIR WORDS OF CRITICISM.
GIVE UP NOW, WHILE YOU'RE STILL ALIVE.
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Unless you LOVE the abuse.
Screwed up? Just do the W+M1!
…
…
…
…
OH WAIT, THIS ISN'T TEAM FORTRESS 2! FUUUUUUUU--
*Shawn Handyside [Rocket Launcher] Artakha*