Thursday, April 03, 2025


If you want your family back, it will cost $1600.

Holding my Pokemon for ransom is one thing… but now it looks like that old couple at the daycare are starting to play hardball!
By Diego_UK

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Posted by Shawn Handyside on April 20, 2011 · 9:57 PM 
FAILLAMENOT BADPRETTY GOODAWESOME (379 votes, average: 4.78 out of 5)
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Categories:
Nintendo, Nintendo DS, Pokémon, Serious Business

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I havnt even seen my dad once, and my mom spends the money i save up on male strippers. Screw it, keep them.
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14 replies · active 723 weeks ago
They're holding Jimmy's family ransom for the secret recipe to Volcano Bakemeat.
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18 replies · active 727 weeks ago
While we were taking care of your family we found this Egg...
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4 replies · active 727 weeks ago
you pay the money and she gives you a ditto...

snap.
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6 replies · active 727 weeks ago
Your mother was a Rattata and your father smelled of Oran berries!
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I'd wait for a few more hours. I need my family to get over level 50 so it can evolve into Xtndedfmly. =D

What? Family is evolving!!

CONGRATULATIONS! Your family evolved into Xtndedfmly!

Xtndedfmly would like to learn Grandchildren!

Forget a move to learn Grandchildren?

>Yes
No

Which move shall be forgotten?

>Childbirth
Teenage Rebellion
Parenting
Incest
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2 replies · active 727 weeks ago
It's not good to extort a person who by the endgame will probably have captured god and some entities that might as well be god.
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5 replies · active 727 weeks ago
You can have them...

Dad was Rash
Mom was Sassy
And my Brother was Naughty.

I think I'll just try to find some of the right nature, maybe even EV train them.
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1 reply · active 727 weeks ago
How much for you to just keep them?
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1600 Pokédollars? That's the price of an Ultra Ball and two Poké Balls!

Hrmm...Family, or pokeballs...Family, or pokebaaaaallllsssss...
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2 replies · active 727 weeks ago
Day Care Lady: "Oh hello, Gramps was just looking for you"

Me: "Yes, probably because you abducted him yesterday."
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"Giovanni's Day-care Center - "Doesn't matter if you dropped them off or not we'll make you pay to get'em back!""
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The kids' family is only worth $16...
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Pokedollars are basically the same as Yen, and ¥1600 is only about $16 USD.

Hm... quite a dilemma we have here...
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1 reply · active 727 weeks ago
So your father is a ditto and your mother is a herracross...
or is that the other way around...
Just what the hell are you kid?
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what a scam.

My pc OAKDOS (Old Anal Koot Directing Obscene Sex) told me I was adopted.

then it sent me through 8 test chambers with the promise that I would find my father and mother... I found my father's corpse but my mother is still missing....
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1 reply · active 727 weeks ago
Don't you know?

MY PARENTS ARE DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAD!
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3 replies · active 727 weeks ago
You know what?
Screw my parents.
I rather spend my money on Lemonade instead of getting my family back.
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1 reply · active 727 weeks ago
And if you refuse to pay, they will be dropped into the incinerator at the south end of the habitat.

Take your time..
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1 reply · active 727 weeks ago
Is everyone stealing our business strategies?!
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6 replies · active 727 weeks ago
First my virginity , then my character's boyfriend, now my penis, what will this old bat demand next?
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1 reply · active 727 weeks ago
'Kay.
Got any eggs for me?
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one would think these jokes would only be funny for so long
but they would be wrong
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Well. That's what you get for pitting your family into mortal combat with mutant animals for blood sport.
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Too expensive. Keep them.
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I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. But what I do have are a very particular set of pokemon, pokemon I've acquired over a long career. If you let my family go, that'll be the end of it. But if you don't, I will hunt you down, I will find you, and I will make your pokemon faint.
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Well, your Pokemon team is like your family.
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1 reply · active 727 weeks ago
The Goldenrod Name Rater should start charging in my opinion. ¬¬
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That's not my family! Don't think I don't see the Ditto in this picture...
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Somewhat relevant:
http://www.halolz.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/...

DAMMIT IT DOESN'T SHOW THE PICTURE
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3 replies · active 727 weeks ago
huh....weird. I expected Gary to be the one to hold my family hostage and charge me a small fee to get them back. Or is it just me?
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Fine,my father left me hells know when,I DONT EVEN REMEMBER HIM!

And my mother does nothing besides spending the money i ask to her keep it safe.

So you can more stay with then,i will go and enjoy my adventure.Hell,the only time i get back to that stupid house is when i need to rub on her face that i became the Champion or defeated freacking Red.
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There's no room in your party for your family. Please go deposit one into your PC.
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1600? BUT THAT IS MY WEEKLY LEMONADE BUDGET!
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I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell
you I don't have money.
But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have
acquired over a very long career.
Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If
you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you.
But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.
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Spy's sappin' his family.
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Ok grandma, we'll visit more often, now put the gun down and let them go
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After this incident, Gold reported this to the US Government...
and now old ladies get patted down by the TSA at airports
(yes I am calling out the TSA)
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I didn't know you could play as Harrison Ford in Pokemon. (anyone get this reference? it's a vaguer one).
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He obviously has enough money to afford that, but...
*Uses it all gambling*
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